DEAR DOCTOR LOVE, please, kindly help me out of this situation. I met this guy sometime late last year. He was pestering me for a relationship but I told him I wasn’t interested in one but that we could be friends. He would call me up, chat with me and generally make me smile. I was starting to like him. Last January, he requested that I visit him at home. I told him I would think about it. Eventually, I visited him last month in February, on Valentine’s Day to be precise. We started talking and bout 30 minutes after I got there, he started touching me and generally trying to get me to have sex with him. And I told him firmly that I did not come to visit him so I could have sex. Anyway, to cut the story short, he forced himself on me. I don’t want to use the word rape, but that’s actually what he did. After I left his house angrily, he started calling me but I didn’t pick up his calls. Then he started sending messages, saying he was sorry and asking me to forgive him. Now, last week, he started telling me he has fallen in love with me and that it was the devil that made him do what he did. What do you think, Doctor Love, should I forgive him and date him? Please, hide my number, my name is Mabel from Port-Harcourt.
DEAR MABEL! MABEL!! MABEL!! How many times did I call you? I hope you’re not deaf. Right now, just pull your two ears, gently remove your two shoes and run far, far away from that guy as fast as you possibly can. You did not include your age in your message, so right now, I have no idea how old you are to be able to measure your level of intelligence. From this message, I’m sorry you do not look to me like a very intelligent young lady. Somebody that you should’ve gotten arrested for doing what he did to you, you’re still here considering whether you should date him. Quite frankly, I suspect that you enjoyed how he rapped you. I think you secretly loved the way he did what he did but you don’t want to admit, otherwise you will not be sounding like this. Somebody that raped you the first time you visited him, and now says he loves you, can’t you see that he must’ve loved the juice in between your legs and simply wants to get the license to continue to enjoy it from you? If you date this one or even contemplate marrying him, you can be sure that he will rape every female around you, whether it’s your younger sister, your friend, your neighbour’s daughter, etc, is that the life you want for yourself? I wish you good luck!
Hello, Dr Love, my name’s Mary. I need your help. I do not enjoy sex with my guy and he’s the only one I’m dating. I don’t want to cheat on him by testing it with another guy. Please, help me…0816881…
Dear Mary, I would’ve liked to know your age first and find out from you if your guy met you a virgin. I say this because, from your text, you sound to me like you’ve never had sex with any other man apart from your boyfriend. If that’s the case, all you need to do is discuss your feelings with your man. Let him know your frustrations. Show him the part of your body that you would like him to touch and concentrate on. If he’s also the type that pays little attention to romance and foreplay and then mounts you even before you get wet, let him know your body doesn’t react well to this. You need to have an intimate discussion with him. It should really worry him too that you’re not enjoying sexual intimacy with him, any man worth his salt should be unselfish when it comes to lovemaking. If a woman can’t feel her man and enjoy him, then it’s as bad as being punished by him. Open up to him and let him know how you feel, hopefully, if he cares about how you feel, he would put aside his own pleasures and work towards satisfying you.
Doctor Love, please, reply me urgently. I have been dating my man for three years now but his ex-girlfriend still wants him back. Although he says nothing will make him go back to her, I am not comfortable with the way they have been communicating on the phone, it’s getting too much for my comfort! Wale, I’m not happy, please, what should I do? My name is Peace from Port-Harcourt…..07031977…..
Dear Peace, I can understand your fears. This is an issue that, oftentimes, rears its head between couples. I can only ask you to calm down and take things easy. If your man says he does not want to take his ex back, then you must believe him. You could also let him know your fears with his ex’s renewed interest in you. But do not push it too much, else he’ll begin to see you as a nag. Three years is enough time for you to know the kind of man you’re dating. If you know him well enough, you should be able to tell if he’s being sincere with you when he said there’s nothing going on between them. My advice is until he proves otherwise, take your mind off the issue and concentrate on making your relationship with him even stronger.
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