Hello, Wale, please, I need your help. I am in a really messy situation right now. My name is Amanda, a twenty-three-year-old. I just discovered that I’m pregnant for my pastor! Honestly, I don’t even know how it all started. All I know is that my dad complained to him (he’s our youth pastor) that I’ve not been serious with my studies and that I seem to have a lot of male friends which made him really uncomfortable. The pastor started inviting me over to his house for counselling and by the second week, before I knew it, we were already making love. And to be fair to him, I think I actually encouraged him because I felt he was nice looking and that we could really be friends. Now, I’m pregnant for him and he’s suggesting that I should go and abort it. What do I do, Wale, I don’t want to die! Please, I beg you in God’s name, conceal my number because my sisters read your magazine.
AMANDA! Amanda! Amanda! Can you possibly hear yourself say what you’re saying? How can you say you don’t even know how it started! The young man didn’t rape you, did he? And he couldn’t have charmed you either. Thank God you have even admitted yourself that you encouraged him. Sincerely, if you ask me, I think you need deliverance. Your father handed you over to your youth pastor, asking him to purge you of your waywardness, and you ended up defiling the anointing of the young man. Now, he has become as wayward and as reckless as you. And you say you don’t even know how it started? I sympathise with the young pastor, he’s allowed himself to be condemned to shame and disgrace. Obviously, even he was not fit to be called a pastor in the first place. And it’s also possible you’re not the first girl in the church he’s gone to bed with. I don’t think you have any other choice right than to inform your parents. I can’t advise you to go abort the pregnancy. I shouldn’t even dare to because I’m not your father. You and your pastor lover must be prepared to face the full consequences of your actions. The church must know the sort of counselling both of you have been having behind closed doors that have resulted in pregnancy. Please, for your own sake, don’t do anything stupid with the pregnancy, confess your sins to your parents, and yes, I know they will almost kill you, but they’re your only option right now, they will know the appropriate thing to do. Good luck to you and your Pastor.
Doctor Love, please, I have a serious problem here. I am a girl of 23 years and I’m married with a baby girl. The problem is that my hubby is going out with a girl in my street. Please, what do I do stop it? My name is Jenifer and I stay in Lagos. Please hide the last digits of my number like you usually do for others Thank you very much, I must say you’re doing a very good job……08035476***
Dear Jennifer, yours is an issue you must be very careful with. To start with, do you have proof your husband is going out with this girl or you’re merely speculating or listening to hearsays? If all you have are suspicions and no proof, your case could turn against you. But if you already have your proof and you can prove to your hubby you have all the evidence you could possibly need to confirm he’s been sleeping with another woman, then confront him with your proof. But it is also very essential that you don’t go about it all in an aggressive manner that may suggest you’re spoiling for war with him. Rather, appeal to his emotions. Let him see how much it’s hurting you and embarrassing you as well, knowing that many others would also know he’s dating the girl in question. Explain to him the pain this brings you and the public ridicule you have to stomach as well. Tell him that if he does not end the relationship and continues to hurt you, you may have no other choice than to inform his parents. That, I expect, should bring him to his senses. But, please, whatever you do, do not get into a fight with your man over this girl, you will only send him running further into her arms if you make the home too hostile for him. And one last advice, I need you to also pay more attention to yourself by making more efforts to look as good as you were looking when you first got married. You need to make him see you’re still the attractive looking sweet girl he married. Best of luck.
Hello, Mr. Wale, my name is Christy. I have a boyfriend whom I’ve been dating for four years. He is a very nice person but the problem is that we seem not to understand ourselves. We argue a lot. He has been asking me to pay him a visit ever since I visited him last year but the long-distance between us is too much. I really wish to see him but my job is not giving me the chance and I don’t have the freedom to go anywhere I want. We used to talk all the time but all that changed. And anytime I try to talk to him about it, we always end up arguing. Please, tell me what to do, I love him. Please, don’t reveal my number.
Christy, you and your man need to ‘calm down’, you hear me? I think that the strain in your long-distance relationship is starting to overwhelm both of you. Long-distance relationships do come with their own peculiar challenges and one of them is the pressure to be with each other after a while that you last set your eyes on each other. And once that meeting is not looking feasible in the shortest possible time, emotions begin to go up. Your guy wants to see you again. You can’t blame him for getting worked up. Now, the problem I have with your request is that you didn’t state your age and neither did you state your location and that of your guy. Having this information would’ve guided me better in offering you the appropriate advice. For instance, if you were of age, I would’ve suggested you speak to your guy about coming over to visit you and then you introduce him to your family as the guy you’re dating. Let them at least, know him. And if he’s at least sincere about his feelings for you, he shouldn’t run away from being introduced to your parents. That way, you could also tell them you wish to pay him a visit once you are able to take a few days off at your workplace. But I do not know how old or mature you really are and if it would be possible for your parents to let you travel out of your base to see a man they hardly know. Try to avoid arguing too much with your man, instead, speak with him gently and let him know you also badly want to see him again but that you both need to put heads together to work out something.