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How To Take Care Of Children With Special Needs

by Reporter
Biodun Adeloye, Rotary Club, Children with special needs,

•LONDON Cake Maker, BIODUN ADELOYE (BEE)

A few days back, London big babe, Abiodun Adefunmilayo Adeloye popularly called Bee Loye, was inducted as the 51st member of Rotary Club of Ikeja South. This beautiful Chocolate Queen is a UK Citizen. She is an event planner, a DĂ©cor expert and a baker. She has a shop at Ogba in Lagos State. She also operates in London, her base.

Abiodun is so passionate about giving, she helps the less privileged. That is why she joined the Rotary Club, a Humanitarian club that does good everywhere. Abiodun is a single mum of 4 beautiful children and they all live in the U.K one of them is Special need child.

She has a special place in her heart for special needs. She made it her job to enlighten people on the needs of these kind of children and she chose Rotary Club as a means of discharging these duties.

During her induction as the 51st member of Rotary Club Ikeja South, she spoke with City People’s Society Reporter, TOYIN OGUNDIYA, about her life, career and why she is so passionate about special needs children.

Tell us about your background?

My name is Abiodun Adefunmilayo Adeloye, I am a single mom of four children, I live in UK and I shuttle to Nigeria to manage my business. After spending over 28years in the UK, it’s always good to come back home and I think I should belong to a group to give back to my community because I have an autistic child and I think it’s not that common in Nigeria.  That is why I joined Rotary Club because I see it as an opportunity to enlighten people about it.

Why did you choose Rotary Club?

I have heard so much about Rotary Club, and I wanted to belong to a humanitarian group, Rotary Club just came to my mind and I decided to join it, I have seen its advert, motto and I know it’s about giving out to people, that was why I chose Rotary Club.

Do you have any friend who is a member of the Club?

Yes, Sister Anthonia. She is the Assistant past President. We actually met on facebook and she told me she is a Rotary member, I also have a friend Obatoyin Ojeleye he is also a past president. He linked me to Sister Anthonia and I spoke with her. She said Obey come and of course, I come to Nigeria regularly which made it very easy for me.

Are you back in Nigeria fully?

I’m back, atleast in a year, I could be in Nigeria. Seven or eight times and I spend like 2 months quietly.

What do you do for a living?

I’m an event planner, I bake cakes, I’m into decorations and I have my shop at Ogba in Lagos.  Are you working on any project that has to do with Rotary Club?

Well, I’m in the Public Relations department and, of course, we will be visiting people, doing a lot of charity works and I am very much interested in that and we do travel internationally as well.

What will you advice youth generally?

I will say, know where you are going. Put yourself in the right Group. Whatever you might have learnt from your parents or your school, put them into use in your community, you don’t need to join bad gangs or secret cult.

Just be good, be positive, let people know that you are Reliable and Responsible.

People usually say, Rotary Club is worldly and I disagree with that, Rotary Club is a Charity body, it’s all about giving to people and that is what God wants us to do. He wants us to show love. As the president said. As a Rotarian, be diligent in whatever you are doing.

What should be expected of you as a new member?

As a new member, I want people to pray for me, support me and guide me because I’m still learning and I am open to learning, I want to learn, I will be attending the trainings seeking advice from my fellow Rotarians who have more knowledge about the club. Because I met them in the club, I might be older than some of them, but I will always respect them, they are still my senior and I want to work with them, I am a team player and I want to work with people to achieve what I want to achieve because one day, I might be at the top doing this same things they did for me.

Where did you grow up?

I was born in U.K we came back to Nigeria in the 70’s, I attended Biola Jacob School in Ibadan and later went to St. Theresa’s Primary School.

I also went to Sabbath Holding Girls Grammar School, I went back to UK after my secondary education, I did my first degree in Sociology and later did my Master’s in Education. In September. I will go back to UK for my post graduate course in Mental Health and early learning disability. Like I told you, I have an autistic child, I want to study that course, so I can help her and gain more knowledge about it and if I am going to be talking to people about it, I need more knowledge and maybe, I might have my own special school for special needs children because people don’t really pay attention to special needs children in Nigeria and that is what I want to focus on.

We want you to advise parents who have children?

In UK, they regard autistic children as disabled, yes they are. At first, I disagreed, I said No my child is not autistic, but she is because, she can’t talked now, but she understands sign language. The government over there is so good. She goes to a special school, she has keys to all the public toilets and anytime she needs it, an assistant is there and I wish and pray that our government in Nigeria would look into that. Instead of taking special needs children abroad, they could always set up a very good school for special needs children with all the facilities we have in those schools abroad. They should employ good teachers well- trained teachers. When people see you with that kind of child, they walk away from you. These children don’t get invited to parties. We should always celebrate these kind of children because they are human beings too, it’s just that they are specially made and they are not dump or stupid, they are very intelligent. They can be blessed with laptops, phones and you will see that they would communicate very well and they will become active but if there’s nothing to keep them busy, they start acting funny.

 People should respect these children. They should always pray for them and assist them. Don’t run away from them, I embrace my child because I love her so much.

Are you saying it is easy to raise an autistics child?

It’s not that easy, you need an assistant, I won’t lie to you, but I show my daughter love, it was shocking to me when I found out at the age of 3, she will be 10 in December and I will throw a party for her because she doesn’t get invited to parties. I am going to celebrate her and other special needs children. I will invite a speaker to talk to people about them, because even in churches, people run away from these kind of children which is not night. There is nothing wrong with the children, when we talk to them and show then love, they will be calm.

I feel they need love, don’t abandon them somewhere, they are just specially made and they need love. Most men tend to leave their wives if they gave birth to these kind of kids, they will run away and leave the mothers to shoulder the responsibility. No man should do that. Stay with your wife and show that child love.

Are you back with your kids?

No, they are still in school.

Do you miss them at all?

Of course I miss them. They come to Nigeria for a long term holiday, 6 weeks or more and they go back and they love Nigeria.

How do you cope staying in Nigeria, while your kids are abroad?

I’ve a 21 years old daughter, I’ve got 16 and 15 and I have a Nanny. As I said earlier, you need an assistant because having that kind of a child doesn’t mean you should not live your life and because I am a single mom doesn’t mean I should not live my life, I need to embrace my life, else I will collapse as well when you have a nanny who could look after your kids.

It’s just that I won’t stay too long in Nigeria, I will just shuttle. My kids know what I am doing in Nigeria because I tell them everything. When there is communication, you can’t get it wrong.

Do you think you want to give marriage a shot again?

If the right person comes, if I am gonna get married, I am not going to have any more children, I just want to enjoy my life and he has to be able to embrace me and my children.

Are you seeing someone?

Not yet, I am taking my time, I don’t want to rush into it, it has to be right.

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