What I Go Through Burying The Dead

•Female Funeral Director, BOLANLE OKUSANYA FEYITA

Bolanle Okusanya Feyita is a 3rd generation funeral director. As the daughter of the late Tunji Okusanya of MIC Funeral Services fame, she’s good at what she does. She’s professional too. With over 20 years experience in the funeral services industry, you need to patronize Bolanle’s funeral service to understand what we’re talking about. Bolanle is well read too! She has a first degree in International Business from the Imperial College London and a Masters in Marketing Communication from the Westminster Business School in the University of Westminster, London. Recently, Bolanle was honoured at City People’s Female Achievers’ Awards and City People’s Contributing Editor, IYABO OYAWALE cornered her for a chat! Excerpts:

Can you introduce yourself to us?

My name is Bolanle Okusanya Feyita, and I am the MD at LTJ Funerals International.

Okay, great. Now, when did you start this company?

LTJ Funerals started about 7 years ago.

How has it been since you started?

It’s been a real fantastic experience; a lot of learning, a lot of discovering different things, a lot of very hard work, serving families, supporting people, and helping them through a difficult time.

What are some of the challenges you have faced?

Some of the challenges we faced are: the unique working environment in Nigeria, dealing with electricity, dealing with people being diligent in their work, and dealing also with the challenges of the economy. You know when we started, how much was the dollar? And, look at how much the dollar is now! So, when we are trying to import, buy or sell things, it is very difficult sometimes.

What went through my mind when my boss introduced you to me that I should talk to you was the fact that we don’t have many female funeral directors like that and you decided to go into this. What was the inspiration behind your decision?

I am a third generation funeral director. My father and my brother died in a plane crash on their way to do a funeral. My father’s company was called MIC, basically, I wanted something to honor their memory and just remember them. We had a lot of things that we had planned for the next generation of the work that we do. My grandfather started first in the 1940s, so we had a lot of things we had planned. The accident happened and I set up LTJ to honor their memory.

Why did you decide to call your business LTJ?

My father’s name was Olatunji and my brother’s was also Olatunji. A lot of people refer to Olatunji as LTJ (as a short form of the name). That is why I called my company, LTJ.

Okay. Now, tell me the full gamut of what you do, you provide caskets? What services do you offer?

We are a complete funeral services company. We do funerals in Nigeria, everywhere across Nigeria. We also do a lot of international work. We sell caskets, that’s kind of like the very bare beginnings of what we do. We do burial sites, graves; we do the whole funeral; the pall bearers, the band, the repatriation. One side of our work are the funerals that are very grand, that people know about, but death is not a respecter of age. So, we do a lot of funerals for the young as well. There are a lot of Nigerians that die outside of the country and they are repatriated back to Nigeria. And there are a lot of people that pass away in Nigeria that need to go back to wherever they are from, so we do that as well. We do cremation and we do a whole load of things in line with that.

How are you able to manage the emotions of clients at such a difficult time, especially when you are negotiating?

I think one of the key things is just to remain a professional person; you have to be compassionate but you also have to be professional. More importantly is the professional side of it and just trying not to let emotions overwhelm you. There are so many stories that when you hear them, even your own heart as the funeral director is broken. As much as possible, we try not to be emotionally involved but just professionally involved. That is the key.

So, how did you get your staff to also get into the professionalism?

I am very grateful; we have a lot of fantastic staff. Some of them have been with us from the very beginning and we have got training over the long-term, looking at the bigger picture. Imagine that you need a funeral service; you go to the funeral director and she’s also crying. Then, what is going to happen? You are not going to make any progress, so, it is very important for us to keep it professional, keep it efficient. I am very grateful because we have a lot of very good people.

Okay, so, how affordable are your services? Our readers want to know.

We do from very simple funerals, like I said earlier; death is not a respecter of age. So, we do from very simple funerals to the grandest of the grandest state burials. We have a wide range and we have something that suits every budget. Depending on what you want, be it simple or elaborate, we provide a wide range. So, we have ranges to fit into every budget.

Let us know you as a person.

My name is Bolanle, I am a third generation funeral director. I have been working in funeral services for over 20 years. My first career is in beauty and cosmetics.

Wow!

I am a make-up artist, I have been doing that internationally from when I was doing my A Levels in school. Around the same time, I was working in the funeral services. So, there are two sides to me; on one side, I am Bolanle, the make-up artist, on the other side, I am Bolanle, the funeral director. I am very passionate about making funerals accessible to this generation and the next, and also encourage people to discuss and be comfortable with what their plans are should they pass away. I try to encourage people to be comfortable discussing what your wishes are; this doesn’t mean that you are going to die tomorrow. I am passionate about this and encourage people to be comfortable to do it too.

So, you actually encourage them to come plan their burial while they are alive?

We have a lot of people who are interested in discussing their options, talking to their families, helping them plan; we have a lot of people like that.

Great! What are some of the funerals you’ve done, or you don’t want to mention them? I mean, high profile ones.

So many. We do from very simple funerals, to state burials for dignitaries, generals and other VVIP. We also offer cremation and repatriation services. You can see some of the funerals we’ve done from the hundreds of videos on our Instagram, Facebook, and YouTube. We are @ltjfuneralsinternational.

Where do you see LTJ Funerals in 5 years?

I see LTJ as a company that is known for serving people at a challenging time, serving them when they have celebrations, and in all kind of areas of their life. I see LTJ being known across different parts of Nigeria.

So, how old are you now?

I am in my mid-forties.

Great, and you have kids?

Yes.

How many of them?

A few. (Chuckles), I’m married and I have children, so yes.

Great, so what do you do when you are not working? How do you relax?

That’s the big question. I am always working.

You are a workaholic? (laughs)

Yes, what do I do? (Smiles), I like travelling, I like being by myself, I love spending time with my family. I also just like relaxing.

Would you say the funeral business has been lucrative?

Err… For me, don’t forget that I am a third generation funeral director so, my family has been working in funerals since the 1940s. Funerals are something that you do not go into because you want to make money. A lot of people will start and stop, so just go into it because you want to serve and help people. Obviously, we are all human beings, we have bills to pay, children to feed, families to support; but, the focus on it is not really the financial side. You know, what do you pay for helping someone who lost their child and you’re helping them to give a decent funeral?  Or, how do you put financial value on somebody who lost their parents and you are helping them to give the dead a decent and dignifying burial? You can’t pay enough for that, no amount is enough. So, for us, it is not really so much about the financial side or that it is lucrative. We are only serving people and helping people.

What advice do you have for females who want to become funeral directors?

Since I started, I get people asking me fairly often and fairly frequently that they want to do it. I think they should just do it. You know women add a very different dynamic to every kind of industry. Women are very compassionate; we just have a different eye. As a result, I really hope that more women would get involved and be comfortable to do funerals. There is a place in the funeral industry for everyone – men and women.

So, you stopped doing make-up?

No. I am still a make-up artist. I am a make-up educator, so, I do a lot of teaching in make-up schools in different countries. I teach make-up artists. That’s basically what I do.

How do you combine work, family, everything?

It is challenging but like everybody, we are all juggling different things and we are grateful to God for that.